4. Didn’t Think It Through
When I was in secondary school, there was this one peculiar boy who used to scare the bejesus out of my mates. Students used to rush out of school as soon as the bell rang and this resulted in very, very long queues and completely full buses. This particular boy used to sprint over to the next bus stop and wait for a bus.
The problem with that was, by the time the bus reached that stop, it was always packed and he couldn't get in. So, every day, he would have to wait a couple of hours for the buses to be empty enough for him to get in. I've got another story about the same boy. We were in our last year about to sit for our GCSEs, and everyone was studying day and night trying to get prepared.
The days of the examinations came and we had our chemistry practical in the first few days of our exams. This boy and his classmates, although not in my class, had to join us that day as we shared the same lab. So basically we were given mixtures of unlabelled elements and we had to run tests on them to figure out what they were.
As soon as we were told to begin, pretty much everyone minded their own business and went off with their tests. Half an hour into the test, everyone in the lab was startled by the noise of a chair falling to the ground. We all looked up and saw this boy run to the very front of the class with a beaker filled with copper carbonate, which is basically a green powder, in his hand.
He then proceeded to smash the beaker into the ground and screamed, "Diagon Alley!" at the top of his lungs. The entire class went dead silent. He went on to look at himself, and after noticing he was still in the lab, he sprinted out of the room before the examiners got to him. We still have no idea what exactly happened and why he did what he did.
5. In Need Of Help
The least weird thing was she would blow her nose then eat it. The bigger weird things were running headfirst into a wall and shouting she's stupid if she didn't get the scores she wanted, and running down the school field with teachers chasing her, while shouting, "I'm a ghost.” We always thought she had something going on and would tell the teachers something needed to be done but apparently they had talked to the parents, and they had refused tests. It was actually kind of sad and people generally just felt a bit sorry for her.
6. Nature’s Pet
A guy I knew in high school had a mouse living in his car. Not a pet mouse or anything, just a wild mouse. He would intentionally leave food in the backseat for it. I almost didn't believe it until I saw the thing run under the seat when he opened the door. He also wore this full cow suit to school one time, which freaked out an autistic kid, who had a specific fear of cows.
There was a lot of debate if he wore it to freak the kid out or if he wore it just to be weird. He's a youth pastor now.
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7. Snack Time
In the first grade, there was this kid who would stand by the sink in the back of the classroom and eat bits of those brown paper towels. The teacher was constantly telling him to stop eating them and go back to his seat.
8. You Can’t Go Anywhere
Reading all these stories of weird kids at school brings back memories of how weird I was. When I was in grade three, for some nonsensical reason, whenever I had to pee, during lunch or recess, I would go into the outdoors accessible washroom, and just pee all over the floor. In the corner though, of course, I'm not an animal.
It felt like the most reasonable thing to do. Anyway, I noticed every now and then the janitor was paying special attention to that particular washroom. I didn't think anything of it and went about my merry way about the playground. Sometime later, we all came in from recess and the teacher sat all of us down in a circle.
She said someone has been peeing on the washroom floor and that's not a very proper thing to do, but she is glad because she knows that none of her students would commit such a heinous act. So I sat there twiddling my thumbs nervously and leaned over to the kid next to me and said something to the effect of, "That's pretty messed up, right?" Man, kids are weird!
9. Free Sample
The weird kid at my elementary school was a self-proclaimed alien. Once, while waiting for the bus, she told me, “On my planet, we eat people like you,” and that wasn't even the worst part. Right after, she proceeded to bite me. We later became friends in high school and she used to give me massages during lunch break in the quad. I just realized now she was likely tenderizing me.
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10. Silent Player
My school’s weirdo was a kid whose nickname was Air Guitar. He had a super long mullet and would run around at lunch playing air guitar in front of everyone like he was Eddie Van Halen playing to a sold out Madison Square Garden. Then he would go ask for hugs from the popular girls. Years later, my friends and I questioned whether that was even weird or just the most incredible display of game we’ve ever witnessed.
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11. Don’t Play With Pencils
This weird kid in my class sharpened a pencil, super sharp, muzzle-loaded it into the recorder, covered all the holes and blow-gunned it at another kid. The pencil went between his eyeball and socket, so fortunately, he kept his sight. Similarly, after I switched schools—this happened before I arrived so I didn’t actually see it—a girl used blu-tack to stick a short and very sharp pencil on a kid’s seat.
He sat on it and it punctured the skin right next to his hole, then perforated his bottom. He needed emergency surgery.
12. The Legend Of Ron
Back in high school we had Rockin' Ron. Oh man, this guy. You could generally always find him hanging out either on the indoor bleachers, the stairwell to the art wing, or the stairway to the theater. I never met anyone who could remember actually having a class with him in it. Almost everything about this guy was black.
He wore a black trench coat, black jeans, black backpack, black combat boots, black T-shirt of some heavy metal band—hence the "Rockin'" part of his nickname, but I have no idea about the “Ron" part—and he had long, stringy black hair that looked like it had not seen a bottle of shampoo since the Reagan administration.
The only thing about him that wasn’t black was his pasty, white skin and his red, perpetually always bloodshot eyes. You see, essentially, Rockin' Ron was singlehandedly my entire school's drug culture. He was almost always rolling a joint when you would see him, and he usually had one tucked behind his ear, hidden beneath his hair where a teacher couldn't see it.
Around noon, you might catch a glimpse of him on the far end of the football field, where he would then jump the fence into the nearby woods. There, he would then spend the remainder of the school day ingesting the kinds of substances that took his brain on an express trip to Pluto. He seemed unusually tall for a high schooler, and he even had an almost full beard.
There was a running gag that he was not an actual student at all, but some drug-addled drifter who just kind of hung around the campus. It's certainly true that the teachers never seemed to bother him. It's amazing, really, especially since it was usually very obvious he was cutting class or stoned or both, and I'm sure a search of his bag would have yielded a goldmine.
Other than asking him to move a few times, however, they never seemed to acknowledge him at all. I guess since he never tried to sell anything to anyone and kept to himself, they just let him hang around, as a kind of cautionary tale to the dangers of drug use. It certainly worked for me. One time, my friend and I were cutting through his forest on the way home from school and found him yelling at an Australian pine.
The only other time I ever heard him speak was on one fateful day when I had to sit out a gym class due to illness. Rockin' Ron was staked out at his usual spot on the bleachers, and I took a seat a few rows in front of him. "It is my understanding that mankind as a species is on the brink of a new awareness." "Huh?" I turned toward him.
For the remainder of the hour, and without once making eye contact or breaking his tone, Rockin' Ron proceeded to regale me with a lengthy, quasi-mystical sermon about his theories on the human races' eventual doom and rebirth. I cannot begin to recall some of his finer points, but suffice it to say, it was one of the most bizarre conversations I have ever had with another person.
It will likely remain that way for the rest of my life, too. We actually saw him around at the graduation ceremony, which was astounding, when you once again consider that he never attended a single class, far as anyone could tell. However, I have no idea what became of him after that. Rockin' Ron, I wish you well, wherever you are.
13. Horsing Around
One girl used to run, or better yet, gallop around the playground on her own, pretending she was a horse. This was at too old of an age for the rest of us to be doing this too. Think 14 or 15 years old. She actually ended up getting a medicine degree and is doing her surgical training at the moment. I bumped into her in a hospital after over a decade.
All I could think of to say was, "Do you still love horses?" She laughed and said she had her own horse now. Figures.
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14. Start Your Engines!
There was this pair of boys in the year above me in high school who used to make dirt bike noises everywhere they went. It lasted months. You'd randomly hear them coming down the stairs going, “Bwaaa bwaarrt bwaaa!”
15. Heads Up!
The list is endless but one incident sticks out in my mind. The boy was getting told off by the teacher and instead of taking it on the chin, he decided to jump on the table, shout, "I'm out of here," and proceed to run full pelt into a steel beam that was supporting the roof. He knocked himself out cold. It was a fun lesson by all accounts.
16. All Aboard!
He pretended to drive around the basketball courts, following the lines, on an imaginary bus. He’d stop to let people get on and off the bus, and then would drive them to their stops, while we walked in a line behind him. When he stopped walking he’d mimic the door opening and closing and wouldn’t let you on or off if you didn’t wait for the signal.
Salutations, Ben the Bus Driver! I hope you achieved your dreams. To clear it up, this was in Australia and he was between the ages of 8-13 when I knew him. We all “got on the bus” because when no one did he’d “drive” around looking sad. He did this all the time, not once and not sporadically. Any time he was outside he was imitating a bus driver.
17. The Many Talents Of John
There was this kid, we'll call him John for now. He was a 5'3” Asian kid who was so well known for being weird in the school, even the teachers were weirded out by him. Here's a list of some of the weird things John did. John had a roller backpack, and when John didn't use his roller backpack, he would wear it on his back and balance his books on his head through the halls.
John could navigate the halls while reading Manga and not looking up, except to walk down stairs. John would also jump the last four steps of every staircase. John wore windbreakers all year long, which is weird considering we live in Texas. Sometimes, he wore full windbreaker suits. John could do the splits, and would do it on command for anyone who asked, any time.
John roundhouse kicked a football player and two potheads in the face, while holding a stack of books in his hand. No one did anything about it. John was also in the top five percentile of our class, and graduated high school after getting his associate's degree. It goes without saying that John was truly an interesting kid.
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18. How To Make A Pencil Disappear
In the fourth grade, one kid got so angry at something, maybe the work we were doing, that he gripped his pencil as hard as he could, started yelling and moaning, and then stuck the sharp end of the pencil square into his forehead.
19. Forbidden Romance
I dated the weird kid in high school—and even a few years after—and the weirdest thing he did was try to date his cousin, while we were together. He also ate grass and his friends and him would talk about the “flesh planet.” I’m not sure if it was something they made up or something they found online or what, but it’s literally a planet made of flesh.
Like everything is fleshy. I don’t remember the details, like if there were any living organisms on the planet or anything because this was many years ago, but I thought it was the weirdest thing ever how they talked about it like it was a thing. I’m not sure if the planet was supposed to be alive or what, but they talked about it on more than one occasion.
It’s not really surprising, because they smoked a lot of weed and did psychedelics. If you’ve ever played the game “The Binding of Isaac” that’s about what I imagine it to be like, but they spoke about it before the game was announced, let alone released. I hated my life back then.
20. Let It Snow
The weird kid in my school, who was also a friend of mine, had really a bad dry scalp during the winter months. He would vigorously rub his hair to get some relief from the itchiness and, in the process, would end up with lots and lots of dead skin on his desk. One time, a girl looked over as he was doing this and loudly said "Ewwww!" That's when he did the most disgusting thing any of us had ever seen.
Wanting to make a statement, he gathered up all the dead skin in a line-shaped pile and snorted it like it was a massive line of the hard stuff. He was kicked out of class.
21. Home Improvement
Interestingly enough, this “weird kid” was actually really well-liked by people at school. He was on the track team and was an insanely fast distance runner. We were pretty good friends in high school and we went to the same summer fine arts camp every year. The funniest thing he ever did was in geometry class freshman year.
Our teacher was explaining planes to us and how, because three points always form a plane, a three legged table will never wobble. Cue the weird kid standing up and exclaiming, “Challenge accepted.” Next Monday, he comes in dragging a giant table into class. Over the weekend, he had built a table with three legs and springs between the flat tabletop and the legs.
If you put a glass on it, it would wobble and fall over. Our teacher found it so funny that he kept the table in his classroom for the whole year.
22. Crafty Kid
My old art teacher told our class a bunch of stories about weird things kids did in her class through the years before she retired. Before she worked at our school, she worked as an English teacher at the juvenile court school. All of the kids there had issues, but there was this one kid in particular who really stuck out to her.
She was assigned to teach him, but the catch was that he had to be in solitary in order to be taught. She was also told that he needed to be watched at all times because he always tried to escape class, and was usually successful. When she taught him, there was a guard posted at the door, the windows were locked and boarded up, and the door was kept locked.
The only things in the room were his desk, his chair, and her desk, so that he couldn’t hide either—apparently he was also extremely good at that. The first time she had to teach this kid, they were put in a solitary room, but it had a closet. The kid went missing, and about three hours later they found him taking a nap at the bottom of the closet.
They actually missed him the first time they checked there. Then another time she had to teach him, but this time the room did not have a closet, or any other visible places he could hide. She left the room for something—probably to go to the bathroom—and when she got back, the kid was gone. The guard was there the whole time, and the room was basically sealed. It made absolutely no sense.
There was no way he could have gotten out. Once again, there were also no places he could really hide. The school went on lockdown while they tried to find this kid. About two hours pass and they finally find the kid when he pushes away the paneling on the wall of the classroom and steps out to casually ask if he could go to the bathroom.
This kid opened up the freaking wall and climbed inside to hide, causing no one to be able to find him for hours.
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23. Clinger
So I had a kid at my school, not particularly bad but just annoyed the everloving bejesus out of me, because I was the only one nice to him. He would follow me everywhere, randomly grab me for no reason, hug me and not give me any personal space, but here comes the worst part. We have school swimming lessons, and you could either get changed in the change rooms or in the showers.
Since I am a shy person, I would always use the showers to get changed, and sure enough he followed me in there, got dressed outside my door, and just when I was leaving my cubicle, he was there, dancing naked. I cried inside that day.
24. Waffle Batter Up
I don’t know if they were the weird kid, per se, but just someone I happened to encounter once in undergrad. One of our dining halls had a station that you could make yourself waffles at, so it had a container with batter in it for you to use, with these little plastic cups for you to fill up and pour into the waffle iron.
This was on the same counter, right next to where the bagel station was, for reference. So one morning, in between classes, I’m prepping a bagel for myself for breakfast, and there are two girls at the waffle station at the same time. I happen to overhear part of their conversation where one of the girls said something to the effect of, “People think I’m weird but I just don’t get why!” to her friend.
Now, this would normally be a totally valid thing to say. However, the statement was undercut immediately by her filling up the aforementioned cup with batter and then proceeding to immediately drink the entire cup of batter like it was some sort of waffle flavored milkshake. She then continued her conversation like she didn’t just do the weirdest thing I’ve ever seen.
It’s like five years later and I’m still in disbelief.
25. Benny Hill Chase
He ran out of the class and I guess attempted to leave the school or something. A bunch of teachers chased him. I could hear running out in the halls and teachers asking where he went. The door to the class was closed but there was a looking into the hallway window. Quite a bit later, I look up and I see him at the little window.
He just looks at us and licks the window, then runs away again and I see a couple teachers run after.
26. Dedicated, He Is
We had a kid who liked to pretend he was an actual Jedi. I remember one time before gym class he was meditating in the locker room when one of the big football players started to yell at him that he wasn’t a Jedi. He was unflinching. The saddest part was that his last name was Bates, so it didn’t take long for people to call him Master Bates.
I actually went to church with this kid and during his senior year at a youth gathering he admitted to everyone that he wasn’t actually a Jedi. We were shocked.
27. Trend Setter
This one kid wore cheap button-down collar shirts to school every day, and he would only ever button the top button and let the shirt billow around him when he walked. He would state that he was convinced by doing this every day it would catch on and he'd start a trend in the school and be popular. He was forever alone on that hill.
28. Always Be Prepared
A kid I grew up with started wearing homemade chain mail to school our freshman year of high school. Every day. For all four years. The armor was about 55 lbs and it had a full hood—widow's peak and all—and sleeves. I believe he wore an undershirt, then armor, and then an overshirt. He was always pretty odd, but he was nice enough.
Plus we had a few classes together throughout middle school and we had connected over a shared love of a few video games, so I felt comfortable asking him why he started wearing it all of the sudden. He then proceeded to explain, for like five solid minutes, the defensive benefits of chain mail versus both sharp and blunt instruments of harm.
Whether it be daggers, pikes, hammers, or even curved blades like katana and falchions, they would struggle against it! I had no clue how to respond to that. I basically just shrugged and told him, "I mean, makes sense." We then both went to our classes. I don't know what I expected, but I guess it wasn't the basic defensive benefits that armor offers.
29. Rock On!
During my final exams, I sat two seats in front and two seats to the side of the weird kid. I finished my paper with about 15 minutes to spare and absent-mindedly looked around the room. My eyes landed on him. He had a Styrofoam cup sitting upside down on a pencil, like the pencil was wearing a hat. He was hitting the cup so it spun on the pencil.
Meanwhile, he was silently screaming at it, and slightly headbanging. I think his mind was at a silent heavy metal concert.
30. Monkey See, Monkey Do
This kid back in year five, Zachary, needed to take a dump real bad. Trouble was, it was about 45 minutes before class started in the morning, and all of the bathrooms were locked. A lot of my friends and I arrived at school early that day to play sports out on the oval and hang out, so we all saw his dilemma unfolding.
Apparently, he was so desperate that he made a run for it to the bit of bushland next to the school to do his business. It was hilarious, to us anyway. We might not have been the most sympathetic 10-year-olds out there. Anyway, fast forward five minutes or so, and Zachary has clearly heard all the laughter, and had gotten pretty upset, and mad.
He emerges out of the bushes, cupping his own poo, and starts throwing it. He runs at all of us and throws his poo at us and everyone he could see. It’s hard to shake the “weird kid” tag after that.
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31. First Words
The guy who growled at everyone and literally wouldn’t speak to a single person, no matter how nice they were. He eventually came to school one day dressed in all black and he had a huge chain, like one for an anchor on a big boat size chain, around his neck. He wore that for a while and we finally just had to ask him why.
He flung it off his neck and held it like a weapon and just went, “That’s why,” and that’s the first time anyone heard him speak. I’m pretty sure he’s actually a really cool person now that he’s grown out of that sort of thing.
32. A Little Too Comfortable
In the fourth grade, our class had a sleepover in school. We had a pool in our school and everyone went swimming. After that, it was time to change. All of the kids just grabbed their clothes and went to get changed in the bathroom, except for one kid, who decided to take off his swim trunks in the bathroom and walk butt naked to one of the classrooms to change.
The thing is, he walked in front of everyone, boys and girls, to get there. Everyone saw him. It felt like the walk of shame. They kept making fun of him and calling him names for weeks.
33. Spear-ited Effort
My best buddy had a pottery class with a very strange kid. He would always run like Sonic down hallways and jump over the trash cans. Sometimes, other kids would line up trash cans and somehow this guy would fly completely over them. He just seemed weird and harmless, right? Wrong. One day, they were in pottery and were supposed to make a pot, vase, anything they wanted.
However, “anything” went a bit too far in this kid's mind and he decided to make an actual spear. I don’t know how it got past the teacher, how it was never mentioned or caught on to, but he actually made the spear. It got baked in the oven and hardened, and then the kid sharpened it in class. My buddy said the teacher did see him sharpening it in class one day.
The teacher attempted to take it from him, but the kid went caveman Spongebob on the school and started stabbing at people to keep them away. I’m pretty sure he ended up running down the hallways being chased by teachers and eventually the SRO. Thankfully, no one ended up getting injured, but it was quite the wild scene.
34. Human Washing Machine
One day, the weird kid contacted some sporty guys from my class and asked them if he could borrow their training shoes in order to lick them clean. He presented it as a kind of win-win situation, as he would get his kinky satisfaction and they would have clean shoes afterward. Needless to say, no one took him up on the offer.
Other rumors say that he let himself get beaten up by fifth graders in exchange for money, but I don’t have any proof to verify this actually happened.
35. No Gesture Is Too Small
In the sixth grade, the weird kid in my class removed all the heads from her Bratz dolls and transformed them into what she thought looked like tribal shrunken heads. She presented one to her teacher on the last day of class for him to hang on his indoor miniature potted tree. It’s still there, 15 something years later.
Plot twist, the weird kid was me!
36. That Was An Overreaction
We were in high school AP English and we were watching Romeo and Juliet, the 1968 version with Leonard Whiting and Olivia Hussey. If you've seen it, you might be thinking, "wait, that has nudity" and you’d be right. It gets to the bedroom scene, and Romeo walks around for several minutes butt naked, then Juliet rolls over and flashes the camera once.
Here's where we get to that weird kid, or TWK. He leaps out of his seat in anger and starts screaming. "This isn’t fair!" The teacher looks at him and says, "Sit down!" TWK, "No! We watched his butt for five minutes straight! She’s just going to flash a breast and that’s it?” Teacher, "Sit! Down!" TWK, "I will not! This is outrageous!"
He shoves his desk and storms out. We didn't see him again for several days.
37. Giving It A Shot
Well, she started dating another, equally weird guy at the school. This was in middle school, so everyone was always super gossipy, but I remember that nobody really got on her case about it—she was picked on a lot—and they genuinely seemed happy together. Then a few weeks later, word got around that they were breaking up.
This wasn’t because of a disagreement but because she took him to a family gathering and found out that they were cousins. Of course, the girl was very open about this, for some reason. Note that I said, “they were breaking up.” It took about another week or so before they actually cut it off. Yikes.
38. Mixing It Up
In the third grade there was this weird kid named Lenny, because of course his name was Lenny. He was famous for mixing up every single item on his plate at lunch. Bananas, mashed potatoes and ham? He’d throw all that stuff together and mash it up into a paste before eating it. Every meal, where applicable. To this day, I have this rule about not letting my food touch because of this psychopath.
39. Terrible Fashion Sense
One kid in middle school always wore striped collared shirts. Everyday, different colors. Horizontal, not vertical. Beyond that, he would stare, and I mean stare, at this one girl with a smile on his face, and not a "crush" smile. It was more of a, "I am going to skin you and wear you as a flesh tuxedo" smile. Beyond that, he was always grabbing her bra strap, snapping it on her back and calling her by strange nicknames.
Also, he wore pants and shirts that didn't quite always reach each other, always exposing his underwear in the back when he sat down, and constantly tugging at his clothes to try and cover up.
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40. Quit Barking Around
Me, I was the weird girl in my year group, who was the only friend to the other weird girl in our year group. I used to pretend I was a dog, like to an unhealthy degree. I would walk around on all fours given the chance. I’ve bitten other kids to the point of drawing blood and getting into trouble. I would bark at everyone. I would growl if people didn’t address me as a beautiful doggy.
God help them if they didn’t pet me right on the head. I did this from say year two, at six years old, to year eight, at 12 years old. Then, my friend of many years sat me down and she told me to stop acting like a child and that it made everyone really embarrassed to be around me. I was really hurt by it but I stopped doing it because I didn’t realize people had stopped playing together at that age.
Then I found another girl who was a bit of an outcast weirdo and we would roll together down the school's big hill. People made fun of us and called us lesbians all the time but honestly I didn’t care. I was just happy I had a friend who would be as weird as me for as long as I needed. We finally stopped after we turned 14 years old.
41. Stinking Up The Place
We had an activity or section or whatnot in the eighth grade science class, where we had to plant a bean sprout in a normal way as a control sample, and then do another as an experiment and see how the alteration impacted the growth. Basically, add some random ingredient to the soil or water it with cola or whatever and see how it went.
Then, after like a month or something, you'd document your findings and try to make observations. Straight forward teaching of scientific method. However, one dude decided to poke a tiny hole in the shell of an egg and put the sprout through that without draining the white or yolk and placed it on top of the soil as his experiment.
It quickly made a layer of fungus that sealed that hole pretty early on. Then when it came time for collection day, he cracked it open and the smell cleared the room. It was one of those double classes that switched at half day and had a divider in the middle, so it chased out like 50 or so kids, two teachers, and two TAs.
It was insanely smelly and I can't believe the teacher let him do it.
42. Organized Chaos
There was this one kid I went to high school with who was weird and kind of an outcast, like me, but people liked him because he was a total memelord. So for his senior year, he decides to audition for the yearly talent show with one of his friends. His application said he was doing a “comedy act” and I mean, he didn’t lie. After that day, NO ONE at the school would ever forget him.
He walked onto the auditorium stage in a tight unitard, which is also funny considering his size, then chugged a two liter of Mountain Dew and attempted to throw up in a trash can, all while his friend played the John Cena theme song on a broken speaker. He then busted out a kazoo and started playing along to it. The kid was a legend.
43. Bird Boy
I was in the fifth grade, and one day a pigeon randomly passed on in the middle of the schoolyard and it was already decomposing. For some reason, me and my friends thought that it was our responsibility to move it, so after we went to class—on the second floor to be precise—we talked about ways to move it with sticks or stones in order to not touch it and get rabies or whatever.
Then suddenly, this one insane kid just enters the classroom with the pigeon in his hand and says, “Look what I’ve found!” Yes, he got made fun of the whole year after that.
44. Copy Cow
Way back in the 70s, when Happy Days was the most popular show on TV, I was in fourth grade and had a classmate whose last name's first syllable was "Cow". His father bought him a letter jacket and told him he would be cool if he started calling himself "The Cowz" in homage to Arthur "The Fonz" Fonzarelli from the show.
So, for months, he went around in the jacket, called himself "The Cowz" and would give a thumb's up, followed by a hearty, "Moooooo!" as Fonzie used to say "Aaaay!" Needless to say, it didn't make him cool or a make-out king like the Fonz.
45. Completely Committed
One of my absolute favorite stories from high school is when a friend of mine, without any acknowledgment or explanation whatsoever, spent one entire day in slow motion. I'm talking about full commitment. He entered the school in slow motion and didn't resume normal speed until he left. In one of our classes together, when the teacher didn't know what was up yet, he raised his hand super slowly.
The teacher called on him, and he proceeded to answer, seriously, a question about macroeconomics, slow as molasses. He did the deep slo-mo voice and everything. The teacher and pretty much everyone else was amused at first, then extremely confused the longer it went on. As for me, I was doubling over with laughter.
Naturally, he was also late to classes that day because he walked the halls so slowly, and I'm pretty sure he didn't even finish his food by the end of our 30 minute lunch period. We kept pressing him for answers and messing with him throughout the day, and he never once cracked. He even smiled slowly. It was astonishing.
46. Another One
I guess I was possibly the weird kid at one point. I thought it would always be smart to have a pair of scissors in my bag if needed, so I always had one in my bag. The thing is, for some reason but now unknown to me, over the span of two weeks, I put multiple scissors in my bag. Then one day, a friend asked during history if anybody had a pair of scissors.
"My time has come," I thought, and proceeded to reach into my bag to take one out. Our teacher wasn't very happy with us and wanted us to concentrate, so he took away my pair of scissors. But I reached into my bag and took out another pair. He took the second pair. I reached in for the third one, grinning, and he took it.
Number four has now appeared. He's starting to get angrier now, but doesn't hesitate to take it. Here comes number five. At this point he must’ve been worried. He took it out of my hands. What's that? Number six. I existed to spite him. Gone. Seven. As if God himself was on my side. Seven pairs of scissors I had. I am God. He is me.
At this point there was terror in his eyes, I could see it. But he prevailed. I think this was a test made by the Gods for this man. He hesitated, but took seven pairs of scissors from me. My friend never got to see one of them. I did get them back at the end of class but during that span of time, I existed to spite him and test his will to live.
47. As Long As You Make Yourself Laugh
In elementary school, I was the weird kid. I stacked all the chairs in my classroom like a pyramid. I got away with this because my school opened up early to let kids in. We were supposed to be in the cafeteria, but I knew my class was left unlocked. It wasn’t the first time I snuck out of the cafeteria to look around unsupervised and get away from other people.
It took me about 45 minutes, as there were only like 15 kids in that class so there were not a lot of chairs. I thought it was the funniest thing ever at the time, but everyone else did not. I still get a slight chuckle out of it, and still think it’s kind of weird. I actually stacked lots of different things, and often in places or into shapes they probably shouldn't be.
48. What A Mess
I had this weird kid in my class who was otherwise okay, but would just do really unexplainable stuff. He once opened his lunchbox in class and threw the contents right into the overhead ceiling fan. It was something liquidy and greenish. It hit the spinning fan and splashed down all over us, onto the walls, and the board.
The poor teacher got the worst of it, as it rained down on his face. As a punishment, the entire class was made to clean the classroom. Surprisingly, we were not mad at him. We all had a real good laugh at it.
49. One Word Answer
In elementary school, I was that weird kid. I didn't talk until I was five years old, and when I started, I had maybe a 20-word vocabulary and only spoke when spoken to for about three to four years. Then at age five, when I just started talking, the local 10-year-old genius—who was actually a genius and graduated at 12 years old—was our neighbor, and he walked up to me and said, “The answer to every question can be found through observing,” and then walked off.
That's it. That is all he said. I, on the other hand, was, and still am, an absolute idiot. What I interpreted from what he said was, “The answer to every question is observing.” Now, I knew this kid had the smarts I didn't have, so I took what he said very seriously, and unfortunately, very literally. My parents were freaking out.
My school had to call my parents multiple times and eventually we had a big meeting that ended up landing me in therapy because for nearly a solid year, the only thing I ever said to anyone was “observing.” 2 x 2 = Observing. What do you want for tea? Observing. What is on the TV? Observing. Why are you such a stupid kid? Observing.
50. Watering The Bushes
He once asked me to play spies with him. Knowing he didn’t play with many people, I said yes. He took me on a mission around the school, before coming to a stop in front of bushes, pulling his pants all the way down, and then starting peeing in the bushes. At that point, I was out.
Sources: Reddit,
